Super Fitness (Quincy, Mass.)

Super Fitness. In Quincy. It's so bad there Sue and I couldn't make ourselves join, even though the price was unbelievably low....though I don't know how low it was because we walked out of there and I said to Sue, I feel like I was just with a used car salesman...if you don't believe me, check out Yelp and see what other folks had to say about this place...

Some big, over muscled guy named...well, let's call him Josh to protect the guilty, showed us around. He was our friend. He showed us around and everything was cool until he brought

us over to a desk and started the big sales pitch...

...this was after he took us downstairs in the aerobics room and put a spin on the new carpet stench that was down there..."we just put in a new carpet...you see: you can still smell it." Later Sue said, can you imagine working out down there with that smell...that spin ranks right up there with the old Cingular Wireless's, "We have fewer dropped calls than the other guys." You're not supposed to have any dropped calls and your aerobics room isn't supposed to smell like a glue factory.

But it was the Big Pitch that got to me...and dumb me, I actually gave Josh my real phone number...Sue told me later she never gives out her real number to guys like that...you see why I say Sue's definitely the brains in this operation?...

The Big Pitch consisted of Josh pitching different deals to us, sweetening each one until I had no idea what he was talking about, and finally giving us one that was just for that night, that particular time if we just signed on the dotted line right then and there...every nerve in my body told me to get up and run the hell out of there...

I thought we got out clean and free...but I forgot about the phone number...I'm at work and my cell rings..this is a few days later...I pick up and here guys laughing, that frat room crap that guys with too much testosterone and too small dicks go on about...Josh is still my friend, my best bud...he asks me what we've decided...I tell him I'm at work and I'm kinda busy...he reminds me that he gave us a free pass to check things out...cool, I say...later...and we hang up...

Then, this past Thursday he calls...he's

not my friend anymore...he sounds kinda mad...and I'm really, really busy at work (you have to be a writer to really understand the pressure associated with the word, deadline) ....anyway I'm cordial, but man, you got me at work and I'm really busy....this is the number you gave me to contact you, he snarls...okay, now I'm pissed (I get pissed when fairly simple concepts aren't understood by bohunks)...I tell him we haven't decided and again, tell him I'm at work and can't talk...he wants to know again what we're thinking...I'm exasperated by this time...what part of "I'm at work right now" don't you understand... obviously, his work consists of calling people up at their work and bugging them...I say, I don't know, then Josh hangs up...click...unbelievable...well, at least Josh won't be bugging me at work anymore...

Here's a note to our intrepid sales rep, and take this from someone who's worked with really good sales people his entire life: When you're working on commission, don't be so desperate. It's suddenly gets really noticeable that you're just trying to make a buck at someone else's expense and you really don't give a damn about servicing the other person. You'll kill a sale that way every time.